Sitting on the Ash Tray at Sioux Valley Hospital
Yes, ash trays in hospitals, this was 1974. There I was, sitting on the ash tray in front of the elevator. I had just left the dialysis unit at Sioux Valley Hospital and when I got to the elevator I was starting to feel faint, a not unfamiliar feeling at the time. I was afraid I would end up on the floor and then someone would haul me off to the emergency room; there was no chair so I sat down on the nearest thing I could find and put my head down between my legs.
Imitation of life, the artificiality of being dependent on an artificial thing.
nausea and syncope became a way of life
Anti-nausea med, I can't remember if it was Tigan or Compazine; but now what I felt was that unmistakable feeling that of an uncontrollable, inevitable, on-coming emesis. Asked the taxi driver to stop, Now!
I picked it up, dusted it off, summoned up a little saliva, and swallowed.
Back in the taxi, we proceeded to the Park Avenue office building for the appointment with the Nephrologist, Dr. Rao
The vasculitis had now self resolved, was not going to be systemic, and if recognized early on, could have been treated successfully before it damaged my kidneys. For some reason I was quite resentful about being told this. It was too late and I just didn't want to know.
